Bert is Evil !
I think those are Ernie's Shoes!

Bert's been known to rape and assault women. But he also seems to like orange-colored muppet friends. We recently received this picture which finally stops a lot of the rumors going on in our guest book. A lot of you people were concerned whether Bert and Ernie were having some sort of relation. We finally have proof. Although poor Ernie could do absolutely nothing to stop this vicious... NO!.. sorry, I refuse to go into details! You can see for yourselves.

(The person responsible for this picture wisely wants to remain anonymous)

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